I have not had my own schedule since well before vacation. Thank goodness we have well organized friends who managed to get us off to that vacation. The memories will always be priceless to me.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Wednesday, May 02, 2012
My thoughts on Regressive Autism.
It's not autism.
Nice try though, lazy science.
© Copyright 2012 Angeline Larimer
Nice try though, lazy science.
© Copyright 2012 Angeline Larimer
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
RIP Guitar #1
Dear Mom,
I'm so sorry that I accidentally broke your beautiful guitar. I thought I wanted to play guitar with my dad. It was fun, but I should've kept it in my hands. I suck at keeping stuff in my hands, and the guitar broke and then... I cried very unhappy tears. There was no help. Even other people couldn't fix it and that makes me so sad. I'm so sorry that I did a ton of bad stuff like yell and kick and punch and stuff. I should've done good stuff like good kids jobs. But don't worry, I was still okay. Tomorrow there's going to be other good stuff like ice cream. When will we have the bestest days of our lives? Doesn't matter, but we'll see!
Your friend,
Jack
© Copyright 2012 Angeline Larimer
I'm so sorry that I accidentally broke your beautiful guitar. I thought I wanted to play guitar with my dad. It was fun, but I should've kept it in my hands. I suck at keeping stuff in my hands, and the guitar broke and then... I cried very unhappy tears. There was no help. Even other people couldn't fix it and that makes me so sad. I'm so sorry that I did a ton of bad stuff like yell and kick and punch and stuff. I should've done good stuff like good kids jobs. But don't worry, I was still okay. Tomorrow there's going to be other good stuff like ice cream. When will we have the bestest days of our lives? Doesn't matter, but we'll see!
Your friend,
Jack
© Copyright 2012 Angeline Larimer
Monday, April 16, 2012
Pick's First Practice
Beautiful Pick has become a jock and loves it. I've never seen her soar so proudly as the day of her very first soccer practice. It's the sport she begged me to play, begged her dad to help her practice during the weeks that led.
We finally consented. I'm glad we did.
After her very first practice, she got into the car and said, "I think I want to be a professional soccer player when I grow up," and I believe her. She's committed, a supportive team player, a great listener to her coaches, and will work on something over and over and over to get it right. All the right reasons to be in a sport.
This blog is usually always about Jack overcoming late talking (and then our recent issues of OCD stuff). Pick has been such an easy child to raise, her stories have been comic relief, with the occasional Little House on the Prairie moments when she says something Half Pint would have said and we all remember instantly what that was like, being a young girl in a confusing world.
She was so easy to bring up, I never obsessed about what she ate or whether or not I was falling short. If I was, she covered for me. If I pushed her, I treated her the way it all worked best for me at her age, but she doesn't need much pushing. She could stand to work on her handwriting and brush her hair a little more often, but other than that, she's ahead.
You can't change a diet for one person in the family, then make the old favorite meals for everyone else. It's too cruel, so I hoped for her understanding, and I got it. She could have complained bitterly about it, but instead she said, "Can I start taking my lunch to school, too?" And lately she's been educating the children at her school about nutrition. Even talks about sensitivities, makes note of the mood swings and evaluates whether it was from too much sugar, not enough vegetables, and says, "I ate my yogurt today, ma, so I'm good on probiotics." She reads labels at the store before she presents me things to put in the cart. She has really embraced healthy eating. I'm lucky.
But as my sister points out, Pick is a stress eater with a sweet tooth. I am not. I forget to eat. She gets caught standing on the counter looking for the bag of chocolate almonds her father hid on the top shelf. When she looks at me in that panic state of 'Where's the sugar?', she knows she's letting her wants over power her needs, and she's so young, I'm on the fence as to whether or not this is a potentially great thing, or a flag to worry about...
The boy in class who said she was too big because he couldn't lift her on the teeter totter probably didn't mean to give her a complex. He's probably frustrated that HE'S not bigger.
She mentioned it, though, and asked if that was true.
We get hit all the time with "Childhood obesity on the rise!" but don't have a clue how to go about discussing it with our children.
"She's on the upper end of her weight range," the doc told us unconcerned. I was not concerned. I knew she'd sprout up this year. Then both my sister AND Tom said, "She was eating worse than all of us. If anyone's benefitted the most from what you've changed around here, it's her."
Then I remembered all of the incidents of night weeping. Just before bed, out of fatigue, she would worry and cry and ask question after irrational question about life, and I thought it was about growing up, so I sat bedside and answered, thinking it would all pass on its own.
It stopped within a week of our healthy diet changes.
Anxiety she didn't even need to feel, just because of what she was eating.
Unfortunately, she was sneaking crap to make the anxiety stop.
Foods like that are rarely in the house any more, though. So she says things like, "Will you go outside and play soccer with me?"
The diet stopped the anxieties, who knows what else we stopped.
She has a green vegetable with every dinner, no fast food, no junk food, no dyes or corn syrup, and very little dairy, though she still loves yogurt and cheese, but even last night she got super crabby after two glasses of cow's milk and then asked me, "Do you think I have a dairy issue, mom?"
"I think dairy makes you sleepy and you're grumpy when you're sleepy, so you should go to bed before you get too tired ..."
The most important change in her I've noticed is how much energy and focus she has gained, and that itself makes all this effort worth it.
It's cool as hell now being the mom with the kid who really WANTS to be in a sport. Watching her focus, study the game, push herself harder, go from having to walk every twenty feet at the first practice, to being the kid sprinting to the finish by the third because she's really anticipating that first game...it's inspiring. Watching her practice her skills when she's NOT playing. Seeing her coach give her the task that involves more calculations because he knows she wants to be good... Walking away from practice with her while she's telling me about every scrape and success, arm-n-arm, smiles and all around good stuff...
She may be a stress eater with a sweet tooth, but exercise to relieve stress will be her lifelong outlet, I have no doubts. I've seen the brightness in her eyes, those pink and happy cheeks, that confidence she's gained while putting on those shinguards.
And if she ends up being a professional soccer player, do not be surprised.
We finally consented. I'm glad we did.
After her very first practice, she got into the car and said, "I think I want to be a professional soccer player when I grow up," and I believe her. She's committed, a supportive team player, a great listener to her coaches, and will work on something over and over and over to get it right. All the right reasons to be in a sport.
This blog is usually always about Jack overcoming late talking (and then our recent issues of OCD stuff). Pick has been such an easy child to raise, her stories have been comic relief, with the occasional Little House on the Prairie moments when she says something Half Pint would have said and we all remember instantly what that was like, being a young girl in a confusing world.
She was so easy to bring up, I never obsessed about what she ate or whether or not I was falling short. If I was, she covered for me. If I pushed her, I treated her the way it all worked best for me at her age, but she doesn't need much pushing. She could stand to work on her handwriting and brush her hair a little more often, but other than that, she's ahead.
You can't change a diet for one person in the family, then make the old favorite meals for everyone else. It's too cruel, so I hoped for her understanding, and I got it. She could have complained bitterly about it, but instead she said, "Can I start taking my lunch to school, too?" And lately she's been educating the children at her school about nutrition. Even talks about sensitivities, makes note of the mood swings and evaluates whether it was from too much sugar, not enough vegetables, and says, "I ate my yogurt today, ma, so I'm good on probiotics." She reads labels at the store before she presents me things to put in the cart. She has really embraced healthy eating. I'm lucky.
But as my sister points out, Pick is a stress eater with a sweet tooth. I am not. I forget to eat. She gets caught standing on the counter looking for the bag of chocolate almonds her father hid on the top shelf. When she looks at me in that panic state of 'Where's the sugar?', she knows she's letting her wants over power her needs, and she's so young, I'm on the fence as to whether or not this is a potentially great thing, or a flag to worry about...
The boy in class who said she was too big because he couldn't lift her on the teeter totter probably didn't mean to give her a complex. He's probably frustrated that HE'S not bigger.
She mentioned it, though, and asked if that was true.
We get hit all the time with "Childhood obesity on the rise!" but don't have a clue how to go about discussing it with our children.
"She's on the upper end of her weight range," the doc told us unconcerned. I was not concerned. I knew she'd sprout up this year. Then both my sister AND Tom said, "She was eating worse than all of us. If anyone's benefitted the most from what you've changed around here, it's her."
Then I remembered all of the incidents of night weeping. Just before bed, out of fatigue, she would worry and cry and ask question after irrational question about life, and I thought it was about growing up, so I sat bedside and answered, thinking it would all pass on its own.
It stopped within a week of our healthy diet changes.
Anxiety she didn't even need to feel, just because of what she was eating.
Unfortunately, she was sneaking crap to make the anxiety stop.
Foods like that are rarely in the house any more, though. So she says things like, "Will you go outside and play soccer with me?"
The diet stopped the anxieties, who knows what else we stopped.
She has a green vegetable with every dinner, no fast food, no junk food, no dyes or corn syrup, and very little dairy, though she still loves yogurt and cheese, but even last night she got super crabby after two glasses of cow's milk and then asked me, "Do you think I have a dairy issue, mom?"
"I think dairy makes you sleepy and you're grumpy when you're sleepy, so you should go to bed before you get too tired ..."
The most important change in her I've noticed is how much energy and focus she has gained, and that itself makes all this effort worth it.
It's cool as hell now being the mom with the kid who really WANTS to be in a sport. Watching her focus, study the game, push herself harder, go from having to walk every twenty feet at the first practice, to being the kid sprinting to the finish by the third because she's really anticipating that first game...it's inspiring. Watching her practice her skills when she's NOT playing. Seeing her coach give her the task that involves more calculations because he knows she wants to be good... Walking away from practice with her while she's telling me about every scrape and success, arm-n-arm, smiles and all around good stuff...
She may be a stress eater with a sweet tooth, but exercise to relieve stress will be her lifelong outlet, I have no doubts. I've seen the brightness in her eyes, those pink and happy cheeks, that confidence she's gained while putting on those shinguards.
And if she ends up being a professional soccer player, do not be surprised.
White Ibis After Lunch
From Animal Spirit Guides, by Steven D. Farmer:
"If IBIS shows up, it means: Every day pause for a few moments at least a couple times and think the thought, Everything is sacred, and observe what happens as you do.
Follow your heart and trust in its wisdom.
You're going to be introduced to some ancient and sacred healing techniques and the wisdom that accompanies them.
This is a very magical time, so keep your eyes, ears, and heart open in order to notice the miracles and wonders around you each and every day.
You're about to experience a very deep and profound healing, one that will cause your life to shift into a different direction."
*Photo taken on Anna Maria Island, Florida, first week of April, 2012.
I have deep affection for birds. They have such character. The way they observe seems on a deeper level than humans do. They watch with those wide open eyes and see everything, from tiny fish under the surf, to a strange looking primate jogging down the beach with wires hanging out of her head.
Whenever I get the opportunity to meet a new sort, I fall for them immediately. The ibis being one of my favorites on our vacation.
Every morning, I got up earlier than I ever do at home just so I could go be seen by them and hope that they accepted me.
That was magical enough.
Whether it translates into the grander scheme, time will tell. I have good memories of a restful week regardless.
Friday, March 09, 2012
Getting there...
Finally came to a consensus we need to meet with an allergist/immunologist. Got that scheduled. I'm relieved. We'll see.
Things I've noticed:
Cortisol creates something akin to an anxiety attack.
Keratosis pilaris gets worse every couple of weeks. I respond by doing more juicing. Read that keratosis pilaris means there's not enough vitamin A. I assumed that if there wasn't enough vitamin A, then the other essential vitamins and minerals weren't being properly absorbed, so I go back to juicing vegetables for him. Now I wonder if it is connected to the presence of the growth hormone.
Kid's an inch taller all of a sudden.
Keratosis pilaris has subsided. So has his spaciness/inability to concentrate.
His sleep has been consistently good. A few nights of anxious dreams, one night of him going through the hallway like the old days, slamming the door to the bathroom before running back to his room. That was a night he had sugar before bed. I still blame sugar for OCD stuff. Insulin is produced in the pancreas, which is also where the digestive enzymes are supposed to come from.
I think we're doing battle with his hormones.
And why would that be?
Not that I don't believe any more that his GI tract was messed up or that his body wasn't producing enough enzymes. The more I read, the more I learn they are all connected.
Read that people with OCD have worse symptoms when in contact with a histamine.
Is this what finally happened beginning last summer, combined with the presence of puberty?
Read somewhere that children given adequate daily intake of magnesium stop having tics. Read that magnesium and calcium work together, so if there's too much calcium, the body stays in an alerted state. Magnesium supposedly calms everything down. Wondered after reading that if too much calcium or not enough magnesium has always been an issue.
Lots more questions than I've ever had, but the consolation is that I have no regrets cutting out the fast food completely for four months. Haven't even ordered a pizza, and there were nights when getting myself up and into the kitchen to properly steam the broccoli was difficult.
Even the kids are singing the praises of this diet. You'd think they'd be asking every day for a drive-thru dinner, but they stopped doing that last December. I'm amazed by how easily they've accepted this.
For the first time in all the years I've known Tom, he has jogged six days in a row.
I don't regret what we've done.
I admit I don't know what happened, how we got here, where we go next.
I'm not the only one who has noticed improvements. They just aren't miraculous over night improvements. It takes months.
So we'll see.
Another doctor visit in a couple of weeks.
Meantime, the kid's got his first over night birthday party to attend.
© Copyright 2012 Angeline Larimer
Things I've noticed:
Cortisol creates something akin to an anxiety attack.
Keratosis pilaris gets worse every couple of weeks. I respond by doing more juicing. Read that keratosis pilaris means there's not enough vitamin A. I assumed that if there wasn't enough vitamin A, then the other essential vitamins and minerals weren't being properly absorbed, so I go back to juicing vegetables for him. Now I wonder if it is connected to the presence of the growth hormone.
Kid's an inch taller all of a sudden.
Keratosis pilaris has subsided. So has his spaciness/inability to concentrate.
His sleep has been consistently good. A few nights of anxious dreams, one night of him going through the hallway like the old days, slamming the door to the bathroom before running back to his room. That was a night he had sugar before bed. I still blame sugar for OCD stuff. Insulin is produced in the pancreas, which is also where the digestive enzymes are supposed to come from.
I think we're doing battle with his hormones.
And why would that be?
Not that I don't believe any more that his GI tract was messed up or that his body wasn't producing enough enzymes. The more I read, the more I learn they are all connected.
Read that people with OCD have worse symptoms when in contact with a histamine.
Is this what finally happened beginning last summer, combined with the presence of puberty?
Read somewhere that children given adequate daily intake of magnesium stop having tics. Read that magnesium and calcium work together, so if there's too much calcium, the body stays in an alerted state. Magnesium supposedly calms everything down. Wondered after reading that if too much calcium or not enough magnesium has always been an issue.
Lots more questions than I've ever had, but the consolation is that I have no regrets cutting out the fast food completely for four months. Haven't even ordered a pizza, and there were nights when getting myself up and into the kitchen to properly steam the broccoli was difficult.
Even the kids are singing the praises of this diet. You'd think they'd be asking every day for a drive-thru dinner, but they stopped doing that last December. I'm amazed by how easily they've accepted this.
For the first time in all the years I've known Tom, he has jogged six days in a row.
I don't regret what we've done.
I admit I don't know what happened, how we got here, where we go next.
I'm not the only one who has noticed improvements. They just aren't miraculous over night improvements. It takes months.
So we'll see.
Another doctor visit in a couple of weeks.
Meantime, the kid's got his first over night birthday party to attend.
© Copyright 2012 Angeline Larimer
Wednesday, March 07, 2012
June 17 at Mooresville Pool 2004
I'm at that age when new parents ask me what my babies were like at various developmental stages and I struggle to remember.
I'd forgotten about the month Pick was all about devouring my face.
I've got at least ten photos of her sucking my face like this.
She laughs so hard at these now, I have to warn her to stop before she pees herself.
So thankful for pictures.
Eagle Creek 6/2009
I remember this day.
I told myself I'd get to the pictures in a few weeks, then never did.
Pick when she was five, sick of my camera.
Before Pickles was Pickles
Was working on baby pictures for other people/other projects, when Pick asked me, "Don't I have any baby pictures?"
HA!
*The good news is, Tom looks exactly the same.
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